Talk or Listen

The lesson of the day concerns the different types of conversations we have in various settings. The take home lesson of the day is sometimes we need to talk and sometimes we need to listen.

If you pay very close attention, to the point of "reading between the lines", you might notice a very interesting dynamic that can exist in conversations of different settings. At work, at home, at social gatherings, all seem to present us with different conversations. Anytime someone speaks, they always have a motive or reason of some kind for opening their mouth. These motives can be very complex or very simple. The reasons can be selfish or selfless. Sometimes, the person will want something, be it information or help with something. Others just simply need a polite, listening ear to hear out what they have to say.

At work, I have learned that sometimes people need someone to talk. Have you ever heard the uncomfortable silence when a large group of people sit down at a table and no one says anything. Maybe each individual is hoping someone else will make the first move and "break the ice." I work at a consulting business where we often have meetings with clients. There seem to be many instances when the client wants the consultant to speak and take control to show their work, or whatever the reason. There will be situations in life where you can put the other person at ease by speaking. Of course, what you say does matter, but all the knowledge and wisdom in the world won't benefit the other person when it's kept inside. People who are comfortable with opening their mouths will naturally attract others to talk with them.

The other side of the lesson often comes from our more personal relationships. Sometimes we need to be a good listener. In some cases, the speaker simply wants a respectful audience. Next time you get the chance, really think about how the speaker feels to have one or more people quietly listening intently to what is being said. Whether or not you agree or understand what they are saying, your respectful silence can really strengthen a relationship. A lot can be learned when you are listening. This is why eager-to-learn students are quietly paying attention while their teacher is talking - because they hope to learn something from what their teacher is saying. So we can increase our learning through simple listening.

Learn to speak when you ought to speak. Learn to listen when you ought to listen. Simple ideas that might keep you out of trouble and help you understand more of what's going on around you.